Poem: A Refugee At Mind
by enna da
I'm a stain, or so they claim
because they are so White clean- exceptionally supreme
And I'm not allowed here because I'm dirty
A Thai ship believed to carry 490 Sri Lankan Tamils arrived in Esquimalt Harbour in Victoria, B.C. August 13, 2010.
Photograph by: Darren Stone, Victoria Times Colonist
Dirty for being in dire need - for requesting fresh air to breathe
But air is not free, they proceed
upon my arrival “the clean” recede
protest my needs, they may just succeed
They may just refuse, my reasoning and story
for the blood I bleed may stain their sleeve
so clean they are, but their blurred vision cant see
I came from within the trashing waves
Crammed inside population that flooded the space
Such small space I could barley move out of place
Dark cold nights, dark memories of our plight…
Survival, my only hope, my only thread of light
put my hand above my chest and shut my eyes tight
“if god exists” let me pray tonight
put me on the shores of Life
Bring me day, end my nights
put me on the shores of sound, of taste, of sight
where others like myself will hear my cries
violent waves I wish you well
carry me safely, carry us all out of this hell
I left everything behind, swallowed my time
and here I’m with nothing but a plea for help
that they claim crime
My homeland lived, within it my home was dust
in the name of rehabilitation time began to rust
her screams beat my ear drums, pierced my gut
another rape - his murderous lust
she cried- strained eyes- clutching her dead child
why was I alive, or was I?
I was desensitized to blood and death and screams that tore the sky
I was tranquilized a little by the lies to reconcile
and It hit me then, I realized how dead I was inside.
So I washed away the blood stains of guilt with passing tides
I know I shouldn’t have left, I should have stuck by their side
But I got nothing to lose now -
no family no home no life.
I’m a witness- mentally beaten- physically numb
I’m a criminal for having been a bystander, but not a terrorist on the run
I have nothing to kill for, nothing of mine still lives
Nothing Sri Lanka’s military hasn't killed already left for me to give
so here I’m empty hands
I can sign my name, and take your laws
just provide for me a place to stand
I apologize for my brown skinned “flaws”
For those of you compassionate enough, please take my sincere thanks
after all I’ll end up working for this country
Adding to its most valuable multicultural diversity
I’ve been racially profiled, targeted, and discriminated against
I already know how it is.
But the only difference here is that I cant be killed for it.
So spit your labels to satisfy your hate
but do it once I pass your gates.
I survived the bombings, the slaughter, the abduction, the mass murders
the fires, the gun shots, the raping of mothers and daughters
I survived the loss of every mother father brother and sister
the blood shed, the tears bled, the broken limbs and torn flesh
I survived the smoke, the hunger, the thirst, the bunkers
then boarded this ship surviving waves, lightening, and thunder
and you think I'm gonna shrivel at the word “terrorist” ?
naming calling is outdated, check the scars on my skin
creep my mind to see where I’ve been
for the sake of being humane try and understand...
and if you still want to send me back…
may the higher power someday forgive your sin.
9 Comments
In moving poem you describe the pain and the innocent pleas of the helpless refugees hunted as terrorists. No eye in a human frame can remain without shedding a tear at this poignant tale. Good will eventually triumph over evil
is our only solace. Well done, my friend. You are a pride to your society. One day we hope we will know your identity.
ISS
Stephen Hawking says within next two centuries we must flee the Earth....
Hawking suggests on the Big Think website that the human race is angry, gluttonous and growing too fast, depleting the planet and risking more frequent international threats like the 1962 Cuban missile crisis. To avoid extinction, Hawking warns that people must colonize space within the next two centuries.
http://www.thestar.com/news/world/article/845893
Re Stephen Hawking
Reducing and resolving conflicts among ourselves is one way of extending(or making the days more tolerable) our existence on this planet.
I was moved to tears reading your hearts cries -
I endorse what ISS says`
and await your story of
success in the near future,
in these colums.
ISS,
I admit they are not terrorists - that is a big lie. Neither they are innocent. While every line moves you, one on the other side of the fence can sense the hatred behind. For thirty long years these poets (not those boat people) were terrorist supporters or sympathisers. It is they who should bear the primary responsibility for the present predicament of these people. Now, as always, they are propaganda masters, only louder. They should not make life difficult for those who are destined to remain.
If brown dirty men hate other brown dirty men just 20 miles across, what can the white man do? I can now understand how Sonia Gandhi became a goddess in an alien country.
In any case I wish these people well and pray that their hopes are realised. May God help the poor from India, Sri Lanka, Pakistan or Bangladesh for some better life in a developed country. Canada and Australia are big countries. They can accommodate these minuscule numbers.
Soma,
We are still without the identity of the poet. Against whom is your venom directed? To me the poet poignantly paints the agony within - him/her and the Tamil people who risk this lives - women, children, the old and all - to escape hell on earth. Unless I am convinced otherwise from you I cannot but think you are, sadly, one of those deeply immersed in unbridled racialism against a particular group. For one who shows signs of a sound education this is unfortunate.
ISS
Excellent work of art.Very personal indeed.The mood is well expressed.It touched my heart.
Wish I could kiss the hand that crafted the poem, like we do to our Bishops back home.
Suhanya
I came from within the heaving ocean,
sickly with the moving waves,
throwing up withg each rising motion,
thinking "God, I should have taken a plane instead for I could have easily afforded"
But then my refugee claim would have been at risk,
I may have been turned away at the airport, pretty quick
Thai Airways forced to fly me back for free
Better I take the boat, which they, I know, cannot refuse
(that is why we came here instead of the US or Australia or New Zealand or every other country in-between)
For "refuge" is not our real claim, migration by any means is the name of the game
For they (Canada) are patsies for this type of thing
I know, because my brothers tell me so
So Canada, be ready for us ...
There are millions more from whence I came
and ships galore for us, we can pay"
Good job Enna Da.
I wonder what kind of commnets we would have read on some of the new paper comment sections, if we would have seen a bunch of white people (men/women/kids)shown up on this ship? Would those have been similar to what we are hearing with these Tamil people?
Can you imagine comments being posted like the following?
"There must be human smugglers and KKK clan members in the boat. Send them all back to its origin risking everyones life in the boat"
I do not think so.